


all i want for christmas is (your dick in a box)

by monsternights



Series: fratboy 'verse [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fraternity, Boyfriends in love, Christmas, Christmas Party, Established Relationship, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Mentions of Smut, no dicks were harmed in the making of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 16:27:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17145161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monsternights/pseuds/monsternights
Summary: Something clicked in his brain. He picked up the box and turned it over. He could just cut a little hole in the bottom and...He grinned. This was a great idea.orthe one where Shiro gives Keith his dick in a box





	all i want for christmas is (your dick in a box)

**Author's Note:**

> i have no words, y’all there is nobody to blame for this but myself. honestly i just wanted to write a sweet fic with my frat boys open christmas presents and then it morphed into...this. It’s totally unbeta’d so all mistakes are my own.
> 
> perhaps i’ll post part two for christmas tomorrow ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 
> 
> enjoy! merry sheithmas!

“Matt, I need help. I don’t know what to get Keith for Christmas.”    
  
“Just get him some knives or something.”   
  
“Oh yeah, that’s a real romantic gift. Hi babe, Merry Christmas here’s a  _ knife _ .”   
  
“Aside from the fact that that’s exactly something Keith would probably want because he is absolutely a little edgelord, are you  _ trying _ to be super romantic?”    
  
“It’s our first Christmas as a couple, I’d like to make it memorable, you know?”   
  
“You could always get him your dic—“   
  
“For the love of god please don’t finish that sentence.”   
  
“ _ A girl like you needs somethin' real _ —“   
  
“Why are you like this.”   
  
“— _ Wanna get you somethin' from the heart _ —“   
  
“I take back every nice thing I’ve ever said about you.”   
  
Matt’s cackles echoed loudly off the walls as Shiro turned on his heel and left the room.

 

—

 

Shiro was not drunk. 

 

No, definitely not. 

 

He’d been thoroughly enjoying an excellent batch of eggnog and maybe they’d dumped in a little more bourbon than intended but he’d only had...well he couldn’t remember how many but he wasn’t  _ drunk _ .   
  
It was Christmas Eve, their annual party was winding down and most of the partygoers had left. Matt was passed out in a pile of tinsel in the corner, Hunk was asleep on the sofa with his Santa hat comically askew while Pidge curled up on the other ending watching the last part of Die Hard that was playing on TV. Allura had grabbed Lance’s hand and pulled him outside an hour ago—they hadn’t returned—and if Lance’s pink ears and sheepish expression as Allura lead him away was anything to go by, they wouldn’t be back anytime soon.    
  
Shiro had ambled back to his room (only stumbling a little, see? Totally not drunk. The walls sometimes moved on their own, that’s all). Tomorrow they would be joining the Holts for Christmas dinner, so Keith was spending time with his mom for the evening. Shiro missed him. Why wasn’t Keith with him all the time? They should just live together. Shiro could give him a key to the house and next semester Keith should just move into Shiro’s room. Matt and Pidge wouldn’t mind a fourth roommate and Keith was a tidy person and the house they rented was plenty big enough. They had  _ two _ bathrooms and  _ four _ chairs at their kitchen table. That was plenty of room. He could totally convince his friends that this was a good idea.    
  
Shiro was congratulating himself on an excellent idea when he remembered with a start...he  _ had _ convinced his friends already it was a good idea. He’d gotten a spare key cut and stuck it in a box that he’d given to Keith earlier than day. He’d cleaned out half his closet and two of his drawers after Keith’s enthusiastic acceptance. How had he forgotten that? How strong was that eggnog?   
  
Dismayed, he realized he didn’t have anything to give Keith (never mind the four other presents that he’d wrapped at put under the tree). He didn’t have anything romantic to give him. Shiro pouted for a few minutes at his unfortunate circumstances until his eyes landed on a stack of discarded Amazon boxes in the corner.    
  
Something clicked in his brain. He picked up the box and turned it over. He could just cut a little hole in the bottom and...   
  
He grinned. This was a  _ great _ idea.    
  
(Okay, hindsight, maybe he was a little drunk).

 

—

 

Some time later (it could have been an hour, it could have been fifteen minutes for all Shiro’s Not Drunk brain could deduce) he heard Keith’s footsteps coming up the stairs. He quickly sat on the bed and grabbed his box, giving himself a good squeeze to get him to full hardness. 

 

Keith opened the door and immediately froze in place. His mouth was agape as he stood staring with wide eyes at his very naked boyfriend sitting on the bed with a santa hat on his head and a box suspiciously perched on his lap. 

 

Shiro grinned lazily. “Welcome home, babe.”

 

“Wh–” Keith cut off and had to clear his throat. “What’s this?” 

 

Shiro gestured to his lap. “I wanted to give you another present.” 

 

Keith took another step into the room and kicked the door shut behind him. He assumed this was either a lost bet or an alcohol-fueled shenanigan that his goofy boyfriend dreamed up after a shot too many. As he got closer he could see the red flush of inebriation in Shiro’s cheeks and the glassy, dreamy shiny in his eyes and deduced it was the former. He grinned wolfishly. 

 

“I wonder what it could be,” he drawled while tracing a finger over the closed box.

 

“You’ve had it before, but I love giving it to you.” And he winked.  _ Winked! _

 

Oh my, whatever Shiro had been drinking tonight made him positively  _ cheeky _ . Keith felt himself automatically flush with the low-grade embarrassment he felt when Shiro got mouthy in bed. He flipped open the box and flushed down to his toes when he looked inside. Shiro’s dick was nestled in some tinsel, looking stunning as always, and even though it appeared to have flagged a little while contained the image was still so absolutely  _ indecent _ it made Keith’s mouth water. 

 

Keith assessed Shiro’s face, still smiling and blinking owlishly. At this rate, he probably wasn’t going to be able to keep it up long enough to fuck him. While a couple of lazy handjobs would still be excellent, once Keith considered the merits of getting fucked into the mattress first thing Christmas morning he made his decision: tonight he would be cuddling his drunk, naked, sweet, amazing boyfriend to sleep and then waking him up in the morning to see just how naughty they could be.

 

“Alright, Shiro, let’s get you into bed.” 

 

“You...you don’t want your Christmas present?” Keith bit his lip to keep from smiling at the pitiful little whine in his boyfriend’s voice.

 

“I think we should save this one to open tomorrow morning.” He said gently, kissing Shiro lightly on the mouth. Shiro bit his lip as Keith pulled away. 

 

“But  _ whhhhhhy _ ?”

 

“Are you sure that my present is...ready to be unwrapped tonight?”

 

Shiro scoffed at Keith and leered in a way that reminded him  _ way  _ too much of Lance. “Babe. This isn’t my first rodeo.”

 

“You mean this isn’t the first time you’ve gotten hammered and given your boyfriend your dick in a box for Christmas?” Keith was barely holding back his laughter as Shiro’s eyes bugged out and he shook his head furiously. 

 

“That’s not what I meant!”

 

“Oh so you mean that you’re immune to whiskey dick, then?”

 

Shiro smiled triumphantly. “Yes! Exactly!” He looked down at his lap and his smile faltered when he saw his erection had softened completely. He gasped “ _ Keith _ . I’m so sorry. I promise it’ll come back!” 

 

Keith finally couldn’t hold back the laughter that erupted from his mouth. Shiro pouted a little, but his moue slid into a dopey grin as Keith continued to chuckle. 

 

“You’re really pretty when you laugh.” 

 

Keith smiled at Shiro, his heart bursting with love and affection for this ridiculous man, and started to manhandle him into a horizontal position so he could cover him with the blankets. He pulled off the Santa hat from Shiro’s head and ruffled the messy flop of hair underneath. 

 

“You’re really pretty too,” he said as he kissed Shiro’s forehead. Shiro’s eyes drooped closed and he snuggled further into his pillow. 

 

“Love you, Keith. Merry Christmas,” he mumbled. 

 

“Love you too. Merry Christmas, Takashi.” 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> 100% grade B crackfic and i’m not sOoOoOoOrry. I might add more tags to this later as i think about it 
> 
> come yell at me on twitter @monster_nights


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